Happy New Year!

Clearly, I am on hiatus; I'm very busy this week shopping the J. Crew sale and entertaining various members of my extended family. But I will be back after the New Year with recommendations about shoes and tights and leggings and jeans, just for starters.

In the mean time, I wish you all a very happy and stylish New Year. May all your days be chic and may your underwear never make an unscheduled appearance. And thank you, as always, for your support and humor and kindness. You are all truly the best.

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When cashmere goes bad

I have nothing to say about this.


Cashmere leggings, J. Crew, $250.00. Available in four colors, as if that makes it any better (which it does NOT).

No, wait, I DO have something to say: just because something is made of Italian cashmere does NOT mean it is a good style choice.

That is all.

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Hosiery options for your LBD

Question: If you are going with a black shorter dress, is it appropriate to wear black hose and black shoes?

Answer: Yes, of course!


Elie Tahari dress, Bluefly, $190.40


With a dressy dress, you have essentially three options for hosiery. You can go bare legged, which is only really advisable at this time of year in WARM climates; if you choose to do this, think about rubbing on a little self tanner, for good measure.

Your second option is sheer hose, which are best with heels; flat shoes and sheer hose can look frumpy. Choose a color that matches your skin tone as closely as possible.

Option three is black hose; choose a pair that are silky and sheer and NOT shiny (although shimmery can work, as long as the rest of your outfit is fairly simple AND you have slim legs). As with sheer hose, black hose are best with a wee heel, because they are dressier than tights or bare legs. A black dress with black hose and black shoes will give you a long, slim leg line, and that's always a good style statement.

For less dressy black dress wearing, you can opt for bare legs or tights (in black or color, depending on your age and outfit and mood). You can also pair a black dress with knee-high boots and wear either tights or hose (but really, wear something; that bare legs-and-boots look is hard for most women to pull off).

And finally, remember that peep toed shoes require either bare legs or tights. No panty hose and peep toes, please.

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What to wear when your baby gets hitched: Mother-of-the-bride dresses, part two

On Monday we covered some general dos and don'ts for mothers of the bride and groom; today we want to talk specifically about what is and is not appropriate for your child's wedding.

Dress your age. I don't mean dress like you are 43 or 50 or 62 or whatever magic number is on your drivers license; I mean dress like an adult who is old enough to have a child getting married. A skirt that leaves most of your leg bare or a neckline that stops at your belly button are both in appropriate for your child's wedding.

Dress your age, take two. Don't confuse grown up with frumpy; you're the bride's MOTHER not her grandmother. Being old enough to have a married child doesn't mean that you are OLD, nor does it mean that you have to check your sense of style at the door. Choose a dress that is sophisticated and grown-up, just like you are.

Dress for your shape. Be honest about your size and shape, and buy a dress that fits both. No matter what your size, the most flattering shape is one that nips in at the waist, which balances your top and bottom halves and gives you some grown up curves.

Shape yourself to fit the dress. I'm not big on body shapers for everyday wear, but if you want a little boost -- or a little tuck -- for the wedding day, invest in a good body shaper. Remember to take the shaper with you when you shop for dresses, though, so you can be sure the fit is correct.

Want some specific dress suggestions? You can find them at AisleDash, of course!

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Tuesday links, and Britney Spears is getting married (maybe)

No time to sleep? Wear this scarf instead!

Just because you're a mom doesn't mean you have to look like one.

The cashmere shawl: think of it as your stylish adult security blanket.

Fashion Find: cool things, every day, just for you.

OMG, is Britney REALLY getting MARRIED?!?

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What to wear when your baby gets hitched: Mother-of-the-bride dresses, part one

I'm getting married in March. I've got my dress picked out (it's
strapless, ivory, with a strip of champagne on the top and bottom, and a champagne lace-up back), and my bridesmaids dresses picked out (pool blue, tea-length, with an empire waist). The more challenging part is now for my mom and my fiance's mom. Although I've told both of them I don't care too much about what they wear, they both would like my input. And, frankly, I don't know what is appropriate for a mother-of-the-bride and mother-of-the-groom to wear. Do their dresses need to be long? formal? certain styles? certain colors? avoid certain colors? Also, they have been asking me where to look for these dresses, which I also don't know.

Angie

Angie's wedding is on a Saturday, at 4:00 pm; as of right now, neither of the moms is doing anything special for the wedding service (they're not lighting a candle or reading a poem or doing a jig to entertain the guests -- that sort of thing). They are just going to show up and look lovely and maybe cry a little. With joy, of COURSE!

With all that said, what should they wear? Let's start with some don'ts, shall we?

The mothers of the bride and groom should choose dresses that compliment -- but do NOT match -- the bridesmaids. They should both steer clear of blue dresses, even different shades of blue from what the bridesmaids are wearing. They also want to avoid colors that are dramatically different from what the bridesmaids are wearing -- say, bright red -- in favor of something more in keeping with Angie's color scheme. Greens and violets are lovely with blues.

The bride's mother should coordinate with -- but NOT match -- the groom's mother. Angie may want to participate in the dress selection because it would be nice if both moms chose similar styles, at least in terms of length and shape. At the same time, though they don't want the same dress in two different colors, nor do they want different dresses in the same color. Having Angie as a go-between can lessen the worry that one mom will choose the wrong dress, and can be a nice way for the three of them to bond.

The bride should be honest with the moms about any preferences she has. Angie strikes me as a very lovely person, not a bridezilla at all, but if there is ANYTHING at ALL that she wants to see the mothers wearing (or NOT wearing) she should go ahead and get it on the table now, before the shopping starts in earnest. No lace suits? Say that, clearly and politely. I promise that the moms will be less upset if she gives them guidelines before they have bought a dress than if she hems and haws about the dress once it's been paid for.

Do not send either mom to a bridal store to shop for her dress. Oh, sure, bridal stores will cheerfully tell you that they carry a WIDE RANGE of mother-of-the-bride dresses, and they do, it's true, but most of them are ugly. Instead, I would send Angie's mother and mother-in-law-to-be to the evening wear section of a reputable department store, or to a small local dress boutique, if there is such a thing where Angie lives. They will get good service and good selection, and while there might not be as many options as there would be at the bridal store, the options will be much better, both in terms of fit and style and quality.

Tomorrow, part two: Dos and don'ts for choosing the actual dress.

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Because the Internet needs more fashion blogs

I have two new projects! Apparently I DO have more to say about shoes and clothes! Who knew?

I'll be over here on Tuesdays, and over here every day. Stop in, say hello, see what cute shoes I've found for you today.

And thank you, as always, for your support. You are ALL the bomb.

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A bride with a heart

Silk shantung dresses by Aria Bridemaids

I am getting married next October. I have chosen brown for my bridesmaid dresses. I have 5 bridesmaids.

1. Sister, a 5'8 SKINNY trendy NYC girl
2. Best friend, 5'10 larger girl
3. 5'6 and a size 8
4. 5'10 and Asian
5. Another toothpick like my sister.

In other words, I have 5 girls that have very different body shapes (duh!) and I want them to pick their own dresses but my worry is that brown is a hard color to match. Can different browns look good together when walking down the aisle?

Help!

Thank you!

Jessica

I love weddings. Obviously. And I love the fact that brides like Jessica are taking the tastes and sizes of their bridesmaids into account when they choose dresses, unlike the Old Days, when the rule was that bridesmaids HAD TO MATCH, which often meant that they all wore a dress that didn't look good on ANYONE. An EXPENSIVE dress that didn't look good on anyone. And THEN they had to listen to the bride say, "You can WEAR IT AGAIN, don't you think? Like for a party?" Sure, a party where we all drag out our worst bridesmaids dresses!

Which probably wasn't what the bride had in mind.

So what should Jessica, whose heart is absolutely in the right place, do to accommodate her friends AND keep her wedding photos looking uniform and balanced?

1. She can go someplace like J. Crew, which does bridesmaids dresses in a variety of shapes and sizes, and choose a fabric and color, and then let the girls choose the style that works best for each of them. Each bridesmaid should order AT LEAST two styles of dresses in AT LEAST two sizes. I know that sounds crazy, and I know that it means asking everyone to put several hundred dollars worth of dresses on a credit card, at least temporarily, but that way each girl will be SURE to get a dress she really likes, and one that fits properly. To really make this work, Jessica can sign up for the J. Crew e-mail list; they are ALWAYS doing free shipping deals on orders over $175.00 (which these will be); the girls can order the dresses, try them on, and then return whatever doesn't work to a J. Crew store. AND if they need a different size, the store can help with the reorder, often WITHOUT charging any more shipping. In the end, it won't cost any more than it would have to go to the store and buy the dress there.

2. Jessica can let everyone choose her own dress at will, and then tie them together with matching wraps that pick up the colors in her flowers. That will gives them a uniform look, even if the dress styles and colors are slightly off. I would suggest that she give her bridesmaids some specific guidelines about the dresses -- that they all have to be knee length, for example, so she doesn't wind up with one girl in a super-short mini dress and another in an ankle-length evening gown. If the OVERALL shape of the dresses is similar, and each girl is carrying the same bouquet and wearing the same wrap, they will all look fine.


Silk cashmere wrap, J. Crew, $75.00

3. Jessica can choose three styles that SHE like from an actual line of bridesmaids dresses (I love Aria Bridesmaids) and then tell the girls to pick from those choices. This is a little more of a compromise than either of the previous options, and for a bride who wants both to let her friends have a dress they love AND have wedding photos that look coherent and unified, this may be the best option. Doing it this way guarantees that all the dresses will be from the same dye lot (as long as the dresses are ordered together) and that the colors will match AND the styles will be what the bride is imagining. This is a good way for both the bride AND the bridesmaids to have some control over the bridesmaids appearance on the wedding day. The photo albums at Aria Bridesmaids are a nice source of inspiration; they are photos of actual wedding parties with multiple dress styles, and they are truly lovely.

4. Jessica should keep in mind that if the bridesmaids are going to be a little less matchy-matchy, the groomsmen should ALSO not be carbon copies of each other. If the men are wearing suits, specify DARK suits and give them a range of colors for their ties (or buy each guy the same tie, again in a color that will coordinate with the wraps and the flowers). If Jessica and her fiance are going to do matching tuxes for the men, though, the girls' dresses need to be the same fabric and color, if not the same cut.

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Tuesday links, and SHOOOOOOOES!

Little boys are adorable, but their clothes are ... meh.

The velvet jacket, for the holidays and beyond!

Also! Why bridesmaids match and what they're supposed to be doing for the bride.

And some shoes. Because I like you all.

The right shoe can make your entire day.

See more of my girl meets shoe list at ThisNext.

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Pragmatic party clothes

Dressing up for holiday parties can be daunting, because holiday attire is, of course, a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT category from what we all wear every day.

Right? Wrong.


Ann Taylor

For evening wear, stick with the same silhouettes you are already wearing for every day. Resist the urge to wear something extreme, something you would never wear any other day; instead of looking sexy, you will only look uncomfortable.

When you are choosing your holiday attire, keep your line simple: bateau neck sweater, A-line skirt. Skip the sequins and short skirts and extra high heels. Make sure you can hug and sit and stand and eat in your holiday outfit, too, because that's what the holidays are all about.

I love the outfit pictured here because it is perfect for virtually any type of holiday gathering: dinner party, open house, office cocktail gathering. It is dressy enough for a religious service but comfortable enough for a long evening with family. You can wear a skirt like this with a variety of tops and shoes; think about a turtleneck and boots, or a skinny silk tee and ballet flats. For a more formal occasion, pair with a ruffly wrap blouse and some killer sling backs, but hold that in reserve for those Really Dressy events.

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Saturday links

Use less stuff this holiday season.

Hanna Andersson makes me wonder if I should have a third baby.

Queen Latifah and Michelle Pfeiffer show us how to work the LBD.

I finally know what I want for Christmas.

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Holiday makeup: Links to people who know

Marie Claire walks you through the smokey eye.

Amalah talks you through false eyelashes.

Cream eyeliner brush, from SmashBox. For the smoky eye.

OR! Smudge brush by Sonia Kashuk for Target. Also for the smoky eye.

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A little glam, at your local drugstore

Here is the classic holiday fashion dilemma: you've got a long shopping list of family and friends and co-workers and teachers, a budget that has to cover all of that and more, and no extra time in your jam-packed schedule. But you're also invited to more than one party, and you would love to have something special and fun to wear.

The temptation to buy a new dress is hard to resist, isn't it? But I have a better alternative.

Change your makeup. Simple, fast, and easy to do without breaking the bank.



Instead of trying to shop for a new outfit for every holiday function, change up your makeup. Trade your ChapStick for a shiny gloss or red lipstick, or opt for some dramatic eye liner. I am loving L'Oreal's HiP Colour Truth Cream Eyeliner. The color is intense and dramatic, and the liner lasts all day. Practice applying ahead of time, though, because once it's on, it's on. Remove with makeup remover.

For dramatic eyes, keep makeup simple: black liner, right at the lash line, a little shimmer under the brown bone and at the inner corner of the eye, and black mascara on the top lashes only. If you are feeling brave, add some false eyelashes, for an extra sexy edge. Keep the rest of your face simple, with muted cheeks and neutral lips.

Alternatively, go with a simple eye and a more dramatic lip. This can be anything from a bold red lipstick to a simple red-tinted gloss, depending on what your normal makeup is like, and what you are comfortable with.

Simpler -- and substantially less expensive -- than a new dress.

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Seeing is believing: Isaac Mizrahi for Target party dress

Often, a picture is worth a thousand words. Sometimes, though, it takes a thousand words to undo the damage a picture does.

Take this dress, for example.


Isaac Mizrahi for Target ponte dress with studs, $39.99

Why on earth would I want you to see a dress that doesn't even look good on the MODEL? Honestly, could that be any LESS flattering? Also, where is the REST of the dress? I mean, who WEARS a skirt that short?

Just wait.

I looked at this dress in person this morning, and it is truly adorable. It has a chic trapeze shape and cool "beading" at the neckline, which give it a fun and funky retro 60s look. It looked as though it would hit a normal height woman right at the knee (just above if you are taller, just below if you're a bit petite). If you are looking for an offbeat, inexpensive party frock for the holidays, I would suggest you take a look at this one, because at under $40.00, it's a good deal. You would even have enough money left to get some cute shoes!

And remember: sometimes you have to go and see the merchandise in person. Or wait for me to do it for you.

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The perfect holiday dress

Need a versatile holiday dress? Strategies and suggestions are at The Working Closet.

See more of my dressing up list at ThisNext.

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The blazer: Outerwear or outfit?

I have added two corduroy blazers to my wardrobe: rust and brown. I have to admit that pairing them with a camisole or shirt look really sharp. I wanted to know if it would be in bad taste to not take them off when I go out. For example, I will be going to a birthday gathering at a friend’s house and I was thinking of getting a leather jacket (I’ve always wanted one of those) and pairing that with a camisole or a sweater. Is it wrong to keep the jacket on? In my mind it’s part of the outfit but if keeping a blazer (tweed, corduroy or otherwise) or a leather jacket on all night is not the socially correct thing to do then I’ll wear something under it that can stand alone.

Thanks again!
Linley

I love this question, because I'm certain that Linley is not the only one wondering this. Am I right?

First, let's define our terms. Outerwear is any piece that you remove when you go indoors -- a peacoat, say, or long winter coat. Outerwear goes OVER your outfit, and is designed to keep you warm as you go from one place to another. You take your coat off when you get to your destination, leaving you wearing only your lovely outfit.

A blazer is typically NOT outerwear; it is part of your outfit. When the weather is nice, a blazer may be the only layer you need to keep you warm. And while you CAN take it off, you are not required to.

Let's think for a second about how men wear blazers (you didn't see THAT coming, did you? but sometimes, the men are right about what to wear and how to wear it). Men will wear a jacket over a dress shirt, which they CAN wear alone, but they will most often leave the jacket on all day (or all night, as the case may be) because it is an integral part of the outfit.

But let's get back to Linley. A blazer or leather jacket over a beautiful camisole or tee or sweater is a completely appropriate choice. The camisole should provide appropriate coverage, of course, because it is a layering piece not lingerie, but as long as Linley is keeping The Girls in check, she's good to go.

So yes! Leave the blazer on! Add a pretty necklace and some terrific shoes and have a wonderful evening!

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Friday Style: Now with even more ways to shop!

Picks from my BlogHer.com gift guide.

See more of my gifts for stylish girls list at ThisNext.

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BlogHer gift guide: For the fashionista on your list

What are YOU asking Santa to bring this year? I'm hoping for an iPhone; it's the perfect accessory for a busy working mom. And I've been a very good girl this year. And next year I will be a very busy girl who needs to check her e-mail from places other than her laptop.

Santa, are you listening?

What are you GIVING this year? I've got suggestions: ten gifts for stylish girls. Or for yourself! I won't tell.

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